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Parents of Scott Herr offer
heartfelt thanks to community
By Jay Turner
Citizen Staff
For more than
eight uninterrupted hours at their son Scott’s wake, Joe and
Linda Herr never once sat down, nor did they ever leave their
place at the head of the receiving line alongside their oldest
son Joey.
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Scott Herr |
Instead, with
equal parts sadness and amazement, they stood there all
afternoon and evening as hundreds upon hundreds of Scott’s
friends, neighbors, classmates, teachers, teammates — even
opponents — came to offer their condolences along with a
handshake or a hug, with many of them braving the cold to do so
in a long line that stretched out into the parking lot and down
the adjacent sidewalk.
The Herrs, in
return, shared a moment with each one of them, and in some
cases, it was Linda or Joe who did the consoling rather than the
other way around.
“That was the
least we could do for those people who came there,” said a
grateful Joe Herr, who described the turnout at the wake as
“unbelievable,” even for someone as young as Scott.
Just 18 when
his life was suddenly taken in a car crash early on New Year’s
Day, Scott was, by all accounts, a model student and citizen —
intelligent, athletic, and just about as friendly as they come.
He also had deep community roots, having grown up his entire
life at the same Roberts Road home and having just graduated
from Canton High School after 13 years in the Canton Public
Schools.
To his
parents, Scott had always been special. Yet Joe and Linda said
they had no idea until the past few weeks just how much he meant
to those around him — how a “regular” kid from Canton was able
to touch so many lives in such a short time — and it is this
amazing legacy of his, which seems to be growing by the day,
that the Herrs fully admit are keeping them afloat during this
otherwise unbearable period of mourning and loss.
In fact, at a
time when they could be as selfish as they want and no one would
mind, the Herrs simply cannot stop thinking about all of the
incredible acts of kindness and generosity that have been done
in their son’s honor. Overwhelmed by all of the support, the
couple shared but a few of these countless examples in a recent
interview at their home, and, in doing so, they attempted to
shed some light on why the Canton community, which had always
held a special place in their hearts, means even more to them
now than it ever had before.
***
The way Linda
Herr figures it now, she and her husband had always been “too
close to the forest to see the trees.”
Perhaps that
could explain why the two of them had always believed that
Scott, despite being arguably one of the most popular kids in
his class, “only had a few friends.”
Of course,
Scott had always been a different kind of popular — respected by
all yet seemingly immune from peer pressure. One just had to
look no further than the classic “bowl” hairstyle he sported
from the earliest ages until his fall semester at Northeastern.
Part of that, according to Joe, was that he hated change, but he
also had a fiercely independent streak, as well as a quiet
confidence, that guided his decision making throughout even the
most vulnerable periods of his life.
Scott was also
incredibly thoughtful, something that his parents witnessed
firsthand on numerous occasions, but perhaps most recently when
they congratulated him for making the dean’s list in his first
semester of college, and he became upset — not because he didn’t
want them to know, but because he had wrapped up his report card
and had intended to give it to them as a gift on Christmas
morning.
These were all
the “little things” that were readily apparent to his parents,
but Joe and Linda were truly surprised to learn how many others
saw this side of Scott as well. And it became clear, they said,
from the moment that word of his tragic accident reached Canton,
when the letters, the cards, the photos, the donations, began
flooding in from seemingly everywhere.
“The
outpouring has just been humbling,” said Joe, “and that’s why we
just can’t thank people enough.”
They struggled
with finding the right words, for instance, to properly thank
Tyler Gavigan, an 18-year-old CHS senior and one of Scott’s
former baseball teammates, who stopped by the house unannounced
to present the Herrs with a baseball signed by all of the
members of their state champion Junior League team, which made
it all the way to the regional competition in New Jersey when
they were 13 and 14.
They struggled
to explain just how much it meant to receive a heartfelt letter
from a kid who stayed in Canton only a few years — a kid who
struggled to fit in yet described Scott as his “best friend.”
Linda said it had been years since the two of them were close,
which made the letter all the more touching.
The Herrs then
really struggled when it came to thanking Brian Fitzgerald and
his staff at Dockray and Thomas Funeral Home who, in the process
of bending over backwards, volunteered to drive to Buffalo, New
York, where Scott had been killed, to ensure his body was safely
brought home to rest.
And the list
goes on for miles: classmates Kevin Ward and Lauren Cortizo for
organizing a touching vigil and slideshow; the Squirt B coach
who never had Scott but still used his story as inspiration
before a recent hockey game; Northeastern University for packing
up Scott’s belongings and driving them to Canton.
Even the rival
Stoughton High hockey team reached out, arriving at the wake en
masse to pay their respects to a fellow competitor.
“Scott was all
about team and sportsmanship,” said Joe, “and it was just a nice
reflection for that moment for two rivals — Canton and Stoughton
— to come together for Scott.”
Meanwhile,
many of Scott’s own teams have come up with ways to honor his
memory, including the Bulldogs, who hung up his hockey jersey on
the wall at Canton Rink and are now wearing his No. 5 on their
helmets, or his NU wiffleball team, which is planning a charity
game in Scott’s honor to be played in the coming spring.
***
Two weeks
after burying their youngest son, the Herrs were still taking
life “hour to hour,” and planned to do so for the foreseeable
future.
But in that
process of slowing down, both Joe and Linda have developed an
even greater appreciation for the town they have always loved.
From the fire and police departments to the schools, to the DPW
and the cemetery workers, it seemed like every group in Canton
was willing to do whatever they could to ease the family’s
burden.
Equally
amazing were all of the donations that poured in for a
scholarship that the Herrs had set up in Scott’s name. Although
the donations came from everywhere, the bulk of them came from
Canton residents; and they are still coming, according to Linda.
“It’s just
above and beyond what we even could have thought,” she said.
“It’s just growing every day.”
Joe said they
now have enough money to help multiple Canton students over
multiple years, and they feel privileged to be able to give back
in this way, just as Scott would have wanted.
In many ways
that can be his ultimate legacy: helping other deserving kids —
kids like him — move on to the phase of life that he had only
just begun. As Joe put it, with Scott, “There was no part two,
but he had a great part one.”
And while
there will never be another Scott Herr, his father knows
firsthand that “great kids are the rule in Canton, not the
exception.”
“That’s just
the town that we live in,” he said with a smile. “Great parents
and great kids.”
February 4, 2010
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